Category Archives: month 1…

Child labor & wizards & knights, oh my!

It’s been a few days since my last confession. Here we go:

Audition #2 has happened…for a show arriving on Broadway later this year called “Lysistrata Jones”.  If you’re interested, it’s a retelling of Aristophanes’ Lysistrata…instead of the Athenian women going on a sex strike until their soldier husbands end the Pelopennesian War, the cheerleaders at Athens U are doing so until their basketball playing boyfriends do something to end their losing streak.  (I was going for the understudy role of  the muse/narrator).  I’ve finally figured out that these required calls, while beneficial for sharpening up your audition technique, are rarely good for much else.  So I go early, sign up, leave and return later to sing my heart out.  Finally, the moment comes…the monitor calls my name and opens the door…I walk in…and I swear I see a juice box and a fruit roll up on the desk.  The “casting director” looked about 12 years old!  Yes, my friends.  Clearly it was bring-your-daughter-to-work day!  Long story short, I sang my song and got out.  She thanked me and complimented my shoes, so it wasn’t a total loss.

She would’ve loved being with us last night as we walked past the Al Hirschfeld Theatre on our way back home, though.  She would’ve had to fight her way through a  fan or two, but she would’ve gotten a some quality time with Daniel Radcliffe as he was leaving his theatre.  What a circus that was!  John Larroquette was out there signing autographs as well…there’s something about him that’s always appealed to me.

Last story: On our way uptown last week, my husband and I got on the 1 train and found 2 seats available on a 3 person bench.  I ended up sitting between Tony and a 60’ish black guy who was involved in a lively phone conversation that went a little like this:

BG:  You ain’t gonna lose no weight, you fat #$%#!!  You gotta stop eatin’  first!  ya nasty mother*&$#%!!!  You ain’t gonna do it you fat piece of @#%^&!!  You ain’t nothin but a #&%*@!!  %$@***!!  %&*##!!

YIKES.  I see Tony’s mouth going to a straight line and his brows starting to knit together, and I knew where this was going…I did NOT want him engaging with crazy man and maybe inspiring him to louder and more enthusiastic rants.  I ‘m telling him to just let it go.  He doesn’t and says:

T:  Hey, man.  You don’t need to be cursing like that in front of my wife.

The man backed down, can you believe it?  Quieted right down, took a hit off his fifth of whisky, then, using a combination of sheepishness and bravado,  started telling Tony he was a “triple OG from back in the day, and don’t take nothin’ from nobody.  My sons been shot, I been shot, and I’m still here.”  He got off at the next stop, but made sure to bid us good day before he left.

That’s my Tony.  Making friends wherever he goes!  And looking out for me.  I am so incredibly grateful to have him in my life.  Now, if I can just remember that when he leaves one square of toilet paper on the roll–baby steps, folks.  Baby steps.

R

Every little step…

I almost bit it on Broadway.  I mean…I’m still piecing together what happened!  I’m sitting in the Zip Car office concluding the rental reservation for our car on Sunday…we’re moving…more on that later…and have just got my pulse back under control.

I was walking on the street on my way here, when I somehow stumbled and began the slow-mo, twisty, scary journey toward the pavement…in my head I was screaming, “OH, NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!  NOOOOOOOO!!!!  I’m gonna fall on this street full of people!  Don’t let go of your bag!  Your computer is in there!!  Your bag handles are barely hanging on…this will bust them up for sure!  And your teeth!  You can’t leave them on the ground again!!!”   Suddenly,  I came totally out of my shoes and righted myself about 4 feet away from where they landed.  I had been struggling to stay on my feet..then suddenly, I was still.  And, miraculously, I was standing!!!  I became aware of the crowd that had gathered to see if I was gonna bite it or not.   I promise you…there were invisible hands that held me up…no way should I have come out of that without kissing the ground.

A nice man picked up my shoes and brought them over to me…and a few ladies asked me if I was alright, while I worked on slowing my breathing.

If my sisters are reading this, I can imagine them rolling their eyes and saying “NOT AGAIN!”  I was kind of a clutzy person growing up…I’ve had some spectacular falls…off a stage at the beginning of a  dinner show (salad in my hair, took out some chaser lights, Barry Manilow kept on singing),  down the stairs at a friends wedding where I was the featured vocalist (right where the receiving line was, of course…THANK GOD they’d already gone in for dinner!), on another stage where I fractured my wrist, busted the 2 teeth I referred to earlier, and knocked myself out cold.

No more, people!  No more!  Send those vibes out won’t you?  The ones that keep me upright and walking smartly down these New York streets.

You have no idea how much I appreciate it.

R

One Week Today…

IT’S CRAZY HOT HERE!  THE AIR IS LIKE MY MOM’S SPLIT PEA SOUP!

My husband and I are holed up in our Hamilton Heights apartment, building up the courage to exit the place for a cultural experience at 3 o’clock.  An afternoon of one-act plays co-written by theatre professionals and kids.  Could be interesting, right?  That’s what I thought…plus it’s free!  We like free.  A lot.

So…week one down! We’ve seen a show (Anything Goes-one of my dearest friends was on for Joel Grey…he was BRILLIANT!), HP7, found Trader Joe’s (yay!) and Target, had some great pizza…my industrious husband  has landed a job (and is looking for more…we like options…and a roof over our heads…and food) and I had my first NYC audition.

Don’t get excited…it was pretty anticlimactic.  What it isn’t any longer though, is a mystery, and that was my goal.  I haven’t gotten an agent yet, so it’s all about getting up early and getting yourself on the audition list.  It’s first come, first served til the slots fill up, so you’re up early to stand in line at the Equity Office.  I was there at 7:45, got into the building at 8:30, then signed up for the 12:30 slot. I like to sing later in the day when I’m totally awake.

I filled the hours by standing in line for Anything Goes rush tickets ($30 instead of $155), getting a fax at FedEx Office, and having some coffee/wifi time.  I got back in time to change my clothes, (yes…you generally don’t arrive ready to step in the room…it’s too hot for that!  you bring your swag and get ready there…) I entered the room, the accompanist kind of acknowledged me when I was talking to him about tempo, and the 2 people behind the table listened politely and said thank you when I was done.  There you go!  I’m told this is pretty much the norm at this type of call…et voila! The Equity Principal Audition in all its glory.

I felt good about what I did, so as soon as I walked out, I began letting the experience go.  That is key, my friend.   It’s so easy to overanalyze and obsess, and nothing healthy or positive ever comes from that.  I WILL  avoid that dark, murky, swirling vortex!  I give myself 15 minutes to think about it, take some notes about what I can do better,  then I let that girl go.

Audition #2 tomorrow!

And now, I must go  to the sauna/bathroom and start getting ready for the day.

R

We’re here!

Leaving LA…wow.  We ended up paying $300 in overweight baggage charges, then the flight was delayed an entire hour (the exact layover time for our  next connection-yikes) and there was no place to sit and while away the time because LAX’s terminal 6 is under construction.  Good times!  Happily, we made our connection and made it to White Plains with no further drama!  We spent the first 2 nights at our friends’ home nearby…saw 2 deer on the way there…one dead, one alive.  Different kind of road kill out here!  He’s got a gorgeous place surrounded by lakes and woods…beautiful.

Segue to Washington Heights.  We’re steps away from the 1 train, which makes it easy to get into the city.  It’s a great 1 bedroom apartment and we’ve totally unpacked and settled in…did a Trader Joe’s run today (yes!) and made it to Target, so we’re good to go.

So here we are.  New York, New York.  Day 2.   The adventure has begun…

R

Almost the beginning…

The real launch date of my blog is a few days away, but I thought I’d write a little something right now.  It’s late, I’ve had to cancel my 6:30 am bar method class because I’d have to get up in just over 3 hours to make it there on time and I know me…that’s not happening.

The resident mockingbird is having some kind of  concert right outside my bedroom window.  I’ll own up to not thinking kindly about my feathered friend tonight.

The real launch date is July 15…blog entry #1 will be written in the airport as I begin the first leg of my journey to my new life.  Weeeeeeee!!!

And now, I sleep…